it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
All I want is dick and wine.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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