atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
high people should be assigned attendants
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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