Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize