Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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