My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
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