What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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