Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
