so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
