I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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