so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
