I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
