I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
i drank out of a bidet.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize