i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
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I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Your penis caused this!
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