My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize