Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
