In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize