UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
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Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
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my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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