Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
