I need help removing her.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
