Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Screwed.edu
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
