My hair reeks of homosexuality.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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