Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
where am i from again
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
