You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
