I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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