I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
