Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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