Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  id be glad to

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  (804): id be glad to http://tfl.nu/spx7
  Replies (19) Good night (1615) Bad night (1269)
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  (619): View more from California

  Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.

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  (619): Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular. http://tfl.nu/9sri
  Replies (36) Good night (3812) Bad night (503)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.

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  (519): All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like. http://tfl.nu/ro2k
  Replies (50) Good night (6492) Bad night (733)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.

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  (603): I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels. http://tfl.nu/ciic
  Replies (28) Good night (3463) Bad night (1616)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"

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  (856): She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk" http://tfl.nu/d5n3
  Replies (12) Good night (6964) Bad night (1041)
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  (650): View more from California

  he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car

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  (650): he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car http://tfl.nu/7wdo
  Replies (5) Good night (1109) Bad night (3478)
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  (716): View more from New York

  just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.

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  (716): just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that. http://tfl.nu/r8dq
  Replies (22) Good night (1739) Bad night (5785)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.

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  (216): Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket. http://tfl.nu/jk3k
  Replies (10) Good night (2758) Bad night (620)
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  (760): View more from California

  It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect

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  (760): It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect http://tfl.nu/8hkz
  Replies (1) Good night (889) Bad night (403)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  do u know what happened to the bottles last night?

  (1-250): View more from British Columbia

  apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone

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  (250): do u know what happened to the bottles last night? (1-250): apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone http://tfl.nu/opnd
  Replies (4) Good night (1385) Bad night (310)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink

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  (705): how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink http://tfl.nu/hb4c
  Replies (3) Good night (983) Bad night (288)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else

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  (954): I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else http://tfl.nu/v2q6
  Replies (4) Good night (955) Bad night (167)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus

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  (540): why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus http://tfl.nu/csxp
  Replies (5) Good night (196) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks

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  (386): I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks http://tfl.nu/f8et
  Replies (2) Good night (749) Bad night (198)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.

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  (651): i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again. http://tfl.nu/awxi
  Replies (2) Good night (220) Bad night (369)

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