Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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