fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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