you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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