what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
