Duck Duck Cougar?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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