who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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