Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
