Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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