The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
do herpes really smell.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
