Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
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she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
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No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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