You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
