Cold hands, warm shart.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Drunk is not a location!
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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