dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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