shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
