I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize