I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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