Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
