one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize
