Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
