I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
