Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
