Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
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