its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
no you cant smoke seaweed
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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