everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
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