Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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