After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
The power of my boobs compel you
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize